Annotations
Worse, networking events are often designed to feel casual on the surface, but there’s a shared understanding that everyone is there to advance their own goals (which may or may not be symbiotic). The rules of engagement are unclear.
The key is to break it down into stages (before, during and after the event) and zoom in on micro-moments that trigger anxiety.
Decide how long you’ll stay. There’s no magic number, but if you’re serious about tackling your social anxiety, the longer the better.
Decide how you’ll leave. Perhaps you leave after a specific event, when the crowd thins out, or with a friend as they head out.
Set goals that are achievable, behavioural, personal and values-driven
Achievable goals are realistic given your circumstances and skills.
Behavioural goals are things you do that can be measured.
Personal goals are specific to you and not contingent on other people.
Values-driven goals are those that align with what matters most to you.
When the self-doubt bubbles up, remind yourself that asking the question is the goal. That’s the social risk you’re willing and able to take – and you can handle whichever answer you get.
One way to break this spiral is to do an honest review that is based in reality, not emotion. Try a psychologist’s version of the party game Two Truths and a Lie.